Getting off the Religious Merry Go Round (Part 1)

(This is a post that I started 2 months ago, but God stopped me from finishing.  I believe it is because I was writing out of hurt feelings and not allowing the Holy Spirit to direct me).

As I have shared before, I have been on a different journey for a while.  I have read scripture and some amazing books, trying to listen to what God was directing me to do.  I know that scripture interprets scripture.  You can read commentaries until the second coming and they are still going to be man's opinion of the scripture.  I also know that the man in the pulpit, is just that, a man.  I am not to blindly follow everything that comes from him, but to measure it to God's Word.  

That being said, I had been caught up in the "religious" Merry Go Round.  Meaning I had tried to keep earning my way to God, by doing good works.  When I didn't measure up, I got depressed and felt like a failure and unworthy of His love.  So I slapped Him in the face and told Him that dying on the cross, once and for all, was not good enough for me.  I had been caught up in performing for those around me and showing them that my works will show my worth.  I would repent, rededicate myself to Him, then when I failed again, the vicious cycle would start all over.  I have gotten off of that ride and I am now letting His Grace flow.  

I had an indication of being on that ride over five years ago, but dismissed the idea and the urging of the Holy Spirit.  I had always been in churches that succumbed to the "we are known by our fruits" philosophy.  On the surface, to a young christian, that seems reasonable.  But I now know that philosophy can quickly turn to legalism and rituals, if not presented to the new christian through His grace.  Grace is Jesus, not a doctrine that we learn.  I have been shown that over the last few months and it is very freeing.  I will write more about that at a later date.  Thanks for stopping by.